Tantas coisas cabem na palavra m.ã.e. Não é fácil entender ou traduzir, mesmo sendo. Duas vezes. É um amor que dói, que de tão grande não cabe na gente, não sossega no peito, não se deixa guardar.
Talvez por isso a gente aprenda a repartir, talvez por isso a gente diga que ama tantas vezes. Pra ver se esse amor “esvazia” o bastante pra não faltar, mas pra ser mais confortável dentro da gente. E não é.
Amar um filho é maravilhoso e não é simples porque vem com medo. Vários tipos deles. A gente tem medo de errar, de estar demais ou de menos. De não saber ler os sinais, de fazer falta, de não fazer.
A gente se preocupa se tem o bastante pra dar, se o que tem é bom e bonito. A gente teme pelo futuro, se o que ensinamos vai ajudar a enfrentar a vida, se vai ser suficiente para torná-los fortes, confiantes, íntegros, felizes…
A gente sonha junto e, mesmo sem ter esse direito, faz planos e se inclui neles. A gente ama tanto, tanto, tanto e isso não garante que eles não sofram, não fiquem doentes, não se entristeçam com as coisas da vida…
O que se há de fazer? Ser mãe nos torna mais fortes, mas não imbatíveis, nem perfeitas, nem eternas. E essa é uma certeza difícil de aceitar porque a gente sabe que o mundo não vai cuidar dos nossos filhos como gostaríamos. Não vai olhar nos olhos, nem oferecer um agasalho, se interessar, de verdade, pelo que eles pensam e sentem e talvez não o aceitem como são.
Não é fácil amar desse tamanho e conseguir garantir tão pouco. Mas, faz parte e, até aqui, tenho aprendido que cada mãe encontra um jeito.
Espero encontrar o meu. Espero que meu amor, mesmo sem garantias, seja alicerce pra se tornarem quem são, de um jeito pleno, feliz, íntegro.
Espero que meu colo nunca fique pequeno, independente do quanto eles cresçam. Espero continuar aprendendo a ser gente e, por causa disso, aprender a ser uma m.ã.e um pouquinho melhor. Obrigada ao meu amor, Eliezer Grawe que divide essa aventura tão grande comigo. Sem um pai como você, eu não conseguiria. Não desse jeito. Não com esses filhos tão queridos. Feliz dia para nós!
P.S: Agora com trilha sonora selecionada por Thiago Ormond. Colaborador e “muso” desse endereço. ; )
Christiane e Liliane Coelho são irmãs gêmeas. Uma é fotógrafa com alma de escritora. A outra, redatora criativa que está realizando o sonho de escrever seu primeiro livro. 
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